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Joke of the Day

"My son asked me why girls pee sitting down. He's too young to know about sex, so I told him they're just lazy."

"What's the best way to attract a pervert? The NSFW tag, you freak"

"I jump out of bushes to give surprise breast exams. I save lives. nnThe police are on the lookout for me. Probably to give me an award."

"A daughter goes to her Jewish father and asks for $20 The father replies ""$10, what do you need $5 for?"""

"What colour animals have the most sex? Brown Chicken, Brown Cow"

"Jihadi math university question: Ahmed has 3 lunch boxes. He gives one to Mohammed and another to Hassan. Calculate the area it will cover after the explosion."

"Agoraphobia I didn't go to my Agoraphobics Anonymous meeting today, obviously."

"My dad hasn't uncrossed his arms since I was born."

"What was early man's best friend? Primates"

"Why is Christmas just like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit."