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Joke of the Day

"If a kid refuses to sleep during nap time... ...are they guilty of resisting a rest?"

"Coffee Joke [OC] So the coffee asked the creamer, ""Are you outraged by our working conditions too, or do you support management?"" The creamer replied, ""I'm half and half."" ^^^I'm ^^^Sorry."

"At my house, it is customary for you to go back to yours as soon as possible."

"I won't block you, but I will put a curse on you that you'll never be able to finish a sneeze ever again for the rest of your life."

"Have you guys heard about the guy who got his left side cut off? well he's all right now"

"Whenever i have a headache,i take two asprins and keep away the children,like the bottle says"

"r/jokes is like a guy with short term memory loss. No matter how many times you tell him the same joke, he'll still laugh like he's hearing it for the first time."

"The worst part about ""Friends"" being canceled is that I've now been stuck with Rachel's last haircut since 2004."

"How do you prevent 9/11? Make it a Malaysian airlines flight."

"I would never skydive. http://i.imgur.com/uRJyOmB.png"