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Joke of the Day
"If pigs really could fly I bet their wings would taste delicious."
Next Joke
"How can you avoid falling hair? Get out of the way."
"My SO just left me for a guy with a conjoined twin. She says he's twice the man I am."
"[i wake up confused] KIDNAPPER: youll never guess where we are! ME: [observing floor tile pattern] this is a Dennys bathroom KIDNAPPER: shit"
"Your mama is so fat... The NSA had to build a 2 billion dollar complex to store her weight information."
"In the United States the colors red white and blue represent freedom. Unless they see it in their rear view mirror."
"what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? a gang rape"
"I forgot why I was retracing my steps so I gave up and re-retraced them back to bed."
"A dyslexic walks in to a bra"
"I always say the same thing when I find out I got a new employee Works for me!"