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Joke of the Day

"Def Leppard are a bunch of liars. I poured some sugar on a girl one time and it was a complete mess, she was not happy at all."

"What are some of the perks of living in Switzerland? Well, the flag's a big plus."

"What do angry beavers build? DAMNITS!"

"Friend: Can I borrow a pen? Me: Sure! *looks in purse* *pulls out perfume, 17 Hershey kisses, a stapler & a baby goat* Me: Sorry, no pen. :("

"A man walks onto an elevator There's a woman on it he looks at her says can i smell your feet ? The woman looks in disgust , no! She replies. Oh it must be your pussy then."

"I saw a poster today, somebody was asking ""Have you seen my cat?"" So I called the number and said that I didn't. I like to help where I can."

"Gregor Mendel's wife asks him why he is always working so much. He says: Bitch, peas"

"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They already did it before it was cool."

"I like my women how I like my dial-up Internet Always going down on me..."

"2 cannibals are eating a clown... ""....does this taste funny to you?"""