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Joke of the Day

"What did Gordon Ramsay say to Hitler? Oh my god put them back in the damn ovens! They're so under-cooked they're writing fucking diaries!"

"What is the most important thing to learn in chemistry?Never lick the spoon."

"When you're talking to someone with no teeth, you find out teeth are also a retaining wall for spit."

"Double standards are the worst. I mean, if a girl sleeps with lots of guys, she's considered a slut. But when a guy does it, he's considered a homosexual."

"I painted my computer black so it would run faster. Now it doesn't work. Then I painted my computer white so it would work. Now the whole system is corrupt."

"Halloween '94: Mom says store sold out of Batman costumes and buys me a Catwoman one. Called me Catman. The worst part: she went as Batman?"

"""Another mans thrash is another mans treasure"" Apparently this is not a good way for saying you are adopted to your kid"

"Did you hear about the man who fell into the lens making machine? He made a spectacle of himself."

"HBO cancels ""Luck"" after horse deaths. Their next endeavor is to make a mini series called ""Glue""."

"Not enough drugs in the world that would make me strip in front of a webcam. But a bottle of wine should do it."