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Joke of the Day

"Need to call in a hot female carpenter to fix this morning wood."

"What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef. The Laughing Stock joke reminded me of this one."

"Poor Susie! Q: Why couldn't Susie ride the swings? A: Because she has no arms! Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie!"

"Statistics are like bikinis. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital. Edit- This is a famous quote by Aaron Levenstein. A Professor told this to a friend."

"Have you heard that joke about pussy? I would tell it, but I don't get it."

"Sometimes I make myself feel important by thinking in a British accent."

"How can you tell which end of a worm is which ? Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs !"

"Treating women is like how you treat Pokemon found in the Safari Zone If you don't feed them and hit them with rocks with the exact right combination, they run away."

"I didn't get the joke about the hot air balloon. I think it was over my head."

"The American stock market is a bear BULL shit"