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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when someone makes a slam-dunk wearing shiny handcuffs? Boom-shackle-lacquer!"

"Why does Noddy have a bell on top of his hat? Because he's a dickhead."

"How do you become a millionaire overnight? Start off a billionaire then make a bunch of bad investments."

"Whoever coined the phrase ""smooth as a baby's bottom"" must have been a real creep."

"Do you know the best part about having only one eye and bad vision? LASIK is half off."

"I nicknamed my girlfriend melody Because its loudest and always on top"

"For every woman with a curve, there are several men with angles."

"What if ""baby daddy"" meant a father who was actually a very small baby? A little baby dad. Baby Dad, coming this fall to ABC Wednesday night"

"One girl did a presentation in hittites and she went through while presentation... straight faced calling it ""high-titties"" everyone was losing it and she couldn't figure out why."

"Why do Native Americans hate snow? 'cause it's white and all over their fucking land!"