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Joke of the Day

"Why do I have to steal the Death Star plans? Nothing this big stays secret. Just Google them. There's probably a torrent somewhere."

"CIA: So what did you call that new tracking software we put on everyone's iPhone? NSA: ""U2's New Album"""

"A woman walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a double-entendre... So he gives it to her."

"Dear XBOX Kinect If I wanted to use my whole body to play sports, I'd play sports."

"What is a homophobe's favorite fruit? Cant-elope."

"Me: Leonard Nimoy died today. Co-worker: From Star Wars? *goes home* Wife: How was your day? Me: Leonard Nimoy and a co-worker died today."

"what did the indian chief say when his dog jumped off the cliff? dog gone"

"How do you know if a black person used your TV? It's not there anymore."

"Shit Post In a packed auditorium, a hypnotist hypnotized the whole audience with a Pendulum. Suddenly, the Pendulum fell down. He said ""SHIT""... It took 3 Days to clean the auditorium.."

"As soon as I walk in, I can feel every woman at the gym dressing me with their eyes."