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Joke of the Day

"Mike Tyson asks you: How do you think the unthinkable? With an Itheberg"

"I wish I was in a gang so I knew what do to with my hands in pictures."

"I used to think the brain was the most important organ Then I thought, look what's telling me that."

"What do a guy crossing Niagara falls on a tight rope and a guy getting a blowjob from a 90 year old have in common? Both are thinking don't look down, just don't look down."

"[home late] Where were you? ""Uh, with my.. gf?"" Gf? Well, tell us about her! What's her name? [commercial on tv] uh.. Lisa.. Brandnewtoyota"

"What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room? Odor in the court!!!"

"I was woken on the plane by a panicky stewardess That's how i lost my job as a pilot."

"Why didn't the astronauts stay on the moon? Because it was a full moon and there was no room."

"If you could go back in time, would you kill Hitler or just watch movies that aren't about superheroes?"

"Donald Trump's plan to build a wall might actually work. The Chinese built a huge wall, and they have almost no Mexicans in their country."