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Joke of the Day

"What does Santa say to the elves after they make the toys? Leave my presents"

"My Mexican waiter put my food down in front of another white lady who looked nothing like me. I get it now. Oh wait that's not my waiter."

"Me: Can u send me those documents? Coworker: Yes, but u can actually get them by-- Me: Nope, don't try teaching me to fish. Not interested."

"JUDGE: I sentence you to 2 consecutive life sentences [60 yrs later: convict dies, is reincarnated] COP: This baby camel is under arrest"

"What is the difference between oral sex and anal sex? Oral sex makes your whole day, while anal sex makes your hole weak."

"How are one night stands like savings accounts? ...you make a deposit, withdrawal, then lose interest."

"Do you know why one side of the the V formation of geese in flight is longer than the other side? Because It has more geese in it!"

"Time to get ready for work Insomnia - OK. You can sleep now."

"Did you hear about the Mexican racist? he joined the que que que."

"What do you call a show full of lions ? The mane event !"