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Joke of the Day

"This gym has a very strict rule no denim jeans or jorts. But if you're 300 lbs of muscle & attitude, apparently it's merely a suggestion."

"CNN: Trump removes screaming baby from rally Fox News: Trump rally interrupted by another unruly, entitled protestor who still lives at home"

"A jumper cable walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, ""I'll serve ya but don't start anything."""

"Why was the man sent to prison after staying up all night? Because he was resisting a rest."

"What do you do with a dead chemist? Barium"

"here's a cool tip for beating the heat this summer: don't go outside ever there's guys who will bring you pizza dumbass"

"Of course I can tweet, talk on the phone, eat a hamburger, and apply my lipstick. I'm only driving, you know."

"An egg and a chicken are lying in bed, the egg's enjoying a nice, post-coital smoke... Chicken looks over and says ""Well, that answers that question. """

"What did the peanut say to his wife before he left? I'll be back in a jiffy"

"What is the difference between a sharply dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? a tire"