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Joke of the Day

"Skydiving without a parachute... Is a once in a lifetime opportunity. I heard this on a spotify ad and it cracked me up. I thought I'd share it.:) Edit: fixed an auto correct mistake"

Next Joke
 
"Why can't Ray Charles see his friends? Because he's married."
"Have you heard of the italian chef that died? He pasta away!"
"Why do we have 52,455,865 pictures of Grandma? -my future grandchildren probably"
"Is okay to laugh if Hitler jokes are considered to be the vorst?"
"What happens after an alligator commits a crime? You call an investigator"
"What's the difference between everybody and bullets? Everybody misses Harambe."
"what the hell does my dog have to sigh about"
"If you never used that plastic thing that keeps pizza from sticking to the box lid as GI Joe's poker table you're too mature for me."
"Girl: I can't wait to have kids! I babysit so I pretty much know what it's like to be a parent. It'll be easy. Me: *laughs for 20 minutes*"