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Joke of the Day
"What do you get when you mix Michael Jordan with Donald Trump? A Dunkin' Donut."
Next Joke
"When someone texts you ""hahahahaha!!"" instead of ""haha"" or ""lol"", you know you've done well."
"Her: You need to text faster Me: Not sure what you just sent. I'm still working on the texts from 3 weeks ago"
"3 days before Christmas, my wife drops her 2007-era iPhone in a public toilet. I get the hint. She wants me to get her a much cheaper phone."
"Two flying turtles found a rabbit inside a hole The rabbit cried out, ""Is it midnight?"""
"A man goes into a bakery and asks for 99 loaves of bread... ""Why not make it a 100 loaves?"" asks the baker, to which the man responds ""who the fuck eats that much bread?!""."
"I RT a bunch of awesome stuff. nnBecause its funny. And I needed to hide my tweets from last night."
"How do you make a dead baby float? Root beer and two scoops of dead baby."
"What's the sound that 10 stubby fingers make on a desk? *Drumpf Drumpf Drumpf Drumpf Drumpf...*"
"Who's Irish and sleeps on your porch? Paddy O'Furniture!"