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Joke of the Day

"Two crows fall in love, move in together, start a family. The perfect murder."

"Q: What do teddy bears like to have in their houses? A: Fur-niture."

"How do you fit an elephant in the subway? You take the letter ""S"" out of ""sub"", and the letter ""F"" out of ""way""."

"I'm looking for a book on lack of empathy', I asked the librarian. Do I look like I give a fcuk?', he snapped. ""Yes, that's the one', I said."

"Knock knock/Who's there/9-11/9-11 who? YOU SAID YOU'D NEVER FORGET!"

"Did you hear about the musician who couldn't even pay to be in tune? He was only a few cents off."

"What does your sex life have in common with a highway bridge? If you have weight limits you aren't going to see as much traffic."

"There's a question in the exam that said, ""What is the past tense of 'think'?"" So I thought and thought and thought and eventually I picked 'thinked'."

"Nick Jonas is popular again... I bet Kevin and Joe Jonas are Jealous"

"You're the only one who understands me, last remaining sleeve of Oreo cookies."