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Joke of the Day

"Why did the former porn actor get fired from his job as a gas station attendant? Right before the tanks were full, he would pull out the nozzle and spray gas all over the car."

"Which U.S. State has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota."

"My boyfriend broke up with because I make too many Linkin Park references, but in the end it doesn't even matter."

"What do vegan zombies say? GRAAAAAAINS!"

"For everyone who's looking, here's a handy list of all the reasons to vote for Donald Trump: There aren't any."

"For Sale: Parachute Never opened, slightly stained."

"A black lady named Betty walks into a butcher shop that's always running out of things and ask for some beef The butcher replies ""No black Betty, ham or lamb?"""

"I'm abandoning Obamacare for Bidencare. Everyone gets a sixer of Natty Light, 2 copies of Hustler from 1978 and a VHS copy of Caddyshack."

"Don't mean to brag but I can turn a pair of fat pants into skinny jeans in like 3.5 months"

"a man walks into a library drunk and says can i have a fish and chips please the woman says sir this is a library and then whispers can i have a fish and chips please"