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Joke of the Day

"In a misguided attempt to become a superhero I let a spider bite me. My super power became crying louder than a newborn."

Next Joke
 
"My brother and I own adjacent farms The other day he rode over to complain that I was growing marijuana on his side of the fence. I told him to get off his high horse."
"Why did the French chef commit suicide? He lost the huile d'olive"
"I have a fear of speedbumps But I'm slowly getting over it."
"Did You Hear About My Friend? His whole left side was cut off... He's alright now."
"Who called it a Spanish teacher instead of an instruction Manuel?"
"What's the difference between a baby and a feminist? At some point in it's life, a baby will grow up and stop crying."
"Why is Kristen Stewart safe from the Fine Brothers? Because she has no facial expressions so can't react."
"I just crashed into the back of a dwarf driver.... He gets out of the car inspects the rear bumper and goes up my window. ""I'm not happy"" he said ""well which one are you then?"""
"Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint."