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Joke of the Day

"a Rabbi, an accountant, a banker, and a doctor walk into a bar mitzvah"

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"How do you get beer from root beer? You pour it in a square glass."
"I'm on the steak diet. You just have four steaks for breakfast, four for lunch, then a sensible dinner of six steaks."
"a seal walks into a club eh"
"If you get your phone wet, put it in a bag of rice overnight Eventually an Asian will come and fix it"
"chuck norris once played pokemon black, caught a lvl 0 magikarp and beat the whole game"
"What does a cue ball and a mexican have in common? The harder you hit them, the more english you get out out of them."
"What's the difference between a clever child and a rude marathoner? One's a cunning runt..."
"Most people prefer quilts over duvets but you shouldn't make blanket statements."
"What is the poo from a fish with no dad called? bassturd"