40116

Joke of the Day

"Pore jew:( What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when its in the oven."

"I like my women how I like my wine... 12 years old and locked in my basement"

"I just read Fahrenheit 451. That book is lit."

"Being from the South, my mother was all about hospitality! Cooking, cleaning, dishes, laundry and even foot rubs! She made me do it all."

"My fake ID is so good, bars never suspect I'm not an organ donor."

"A video montage of all the times my foot, still wet from the shower, has clung to my underwear as I pull them on, and I've lost my balance."

"I'm gods gift to women if god only shopped at Rite Aid."

"If you're upset about seeing a middle finger on TV, you're going to shit yourself when you see everything else going on in the world."

"ME: I have so many questions SOOTHSAYER: forsooth ME: Exactly lol S: SOOTH ME: Yeah so- S: Sooth? ME: You only say sooth eh S: *nods* sooth"

"What does a pimp and a redneck have on common? They both like to throw a ho-down."