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Joke of the Day
"My wife can suffer in silence louder than anyone I know."
Next Joke
"Why do businessmen carry umbrellas? Because umbrellas can't walk."
"DATE: I'm leaving ME: Why? D: You keep pretending to be a bat M: I don't D: You're doing it right now [a single tear rolls up my forehead]"
"An Eskimo's lover leans in close and says.. ""baby, kiss me."" The Eskimo leans forward, shakes his head, and says ""no""."
"I [19/M] am in a D/s relationship, and mistook some pushover chick from my uni for my GF [18/F]! Whoops, wrong sub."
"Dating tip: Don't offer to pay. It's a sign of weakness. Build trust through mutual agreement to steal. No one suspects the ""happy couple."""
"When a pterodactyl urinates, no one hears it. (silent P)"
"You should be wearing a jersey so i dont have to ask for your name or number"
"What do you call a mathematician who drinks too much? A functioning alcoholic."
"What do rednecks do on Halloween? Pump kin"