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Joke of the Day

"Scientists say there are now 4 confirmed states of matter Solid matter Liquid matter Gas matter and most recently... Black Lives matter"

"Why does Luigi bring an extra pair of overalls when he golfs? In case he gets a hole-in-one"

"A pirate walks into a bar And the bartender says, ""hey, you know you have a steering wheel hanging from your zipper?"". The pirate replies,""arrr, I know, it's driving me nuts""."

"Did you hear about the lazy perfume-maker? He made no scents."

"i want a segway so i can ride my segway away from my problems"

"Remember these two words. They will open up the doors in your life. Push and pull"

"Told to me today by a random toddler Her: Knock, knock Me: Who's there? Banana Banana who? Aren't you glad I didn't say orange? Best telling of that joke ever."

"He just gave me his last bit of bacon. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. It was a proposal right?"

"Did you know that if you pull off a lizard's tail it'll grow back? And if you pull it off again the lizard will be like, ""Dude, c'mon..."""

"What do you call a comedian that can't get a girl pregnant? Carl Barron"