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Joke of the Day

"Feeding your cat a vegan diet is actually pretty easy. The trick is to cut up the vegans in to very small chunks first."

Next Joke
 
"What do you with an elephant with three balls? Walk him and pitch to the Rhino."
"There was time in the old west A dog with three legs walks into a saloon, he slams open the doors, looks around at the startled patrons and asks, ""Anyone seen my PAW?"""
"*placing Trump & Hillary signs on my lawn Neighbor: ""Confused about who to vote for?"" Me: ""What? No! I'm making a Halloween haunted house."""
"Man to wife: Business is bad, if YOU learn TO cook we can remove servant. Wife: If YOU learn how to fuck we can remove driver, gardener & watchman..."
"What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car"
"Don't listen to anything your ex boyfriend says. He is always wrong. Unless he says you're spectacular and give good head, then, he is right"
"What's the most dishonest creature in the sea? The Lionfish."
"My grandfather told me that our generation depends too much on technology... ...so I unplugged his life support."
"Heavy metal is not intimidating to me because half of the time it's just the plot of Lord Of The Rings yelled over guitar solos."