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Joke of the Day

"Jesus Christ fed 2,000 people with 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish But Hitler made 6,000,000 jews toast EDIT: Holy shit guys, 2700?!"

"What would you call an additional day added to the week? Sumday"

"I tried uploading my sex tape to PornHub. They told me to try Vine."

"Why don't gelding horses like to race? Because every time they go to the starting gate they're reminded ""They're Off!""."

"When/why do feminists hate cannibals? When they make sandwiches, because they're man-spreading."

"There's a new band called ""1023Mb"" They don't have any gigs yet."

"Good cop: you two could go away for six years each for this Add cop: for a total of twelve years between you"

"If you were playing a drinking game where you took a sip every time they said ""Lebron,"" you'd die."

"The first guy to ever throw water at girl in a white shirt probably broke the record for the number of high-fives received in one minute."

"I wish Bill Clinton would stop pointing his finger at everyone, Lord knows where that finger has been. #DNC #DirtyPoonTang"