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Joke of the Day
"I like sleeping, it's like death without the commitment."
Next Joke
"[Showing a friend around the house] Me: And THIS is where my 5 yr old eats his popcorn. *motions to area covered in popcorn."
"I finally admitted to my girlfriend, ""I think I struggle with gender issues... ...because whenever I see you girl, I realize I wanna be inside a woman's body."""
"What do you call sandpaper on fire? Bernie Sanders"
"If abortion is murder then are condoms kidnaping?"
"What to mopeds and fat chicks have in common? They're both fun to ride until one of your friends sees you on one."
"They still won't let me on Shark Tank with my feminine hygiene products with Yo Momma jokes printed on 'em. That shit's racist."
"Don't sleep with family members... ...no matter how much they incest."
"What can a Chicken do that you cannot? Eat with his pecker."
"I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down."