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Joke of the Day

"Why did the coed have sex with a Mexican? Her professor told her if she wanted to pass, she had to do an essay"

"What do you call a pod of musical whales? An *orca*stra!"

"My name is Seamus and I build that bridge you just drove over. It's the longest spanning bridge in Ireland. Do they call me Seamus the Famous Bridge Builder? No, they don't, but fuck one sheep..."

"Happy 12th birthday to Google. Only one year left to use it, dears! When it becomes a teenager, it won't answer anything."

"I was going to post this funny incest joke last night... But I was too busy nailing OP's mom"

"I used to be in a band called Missing Cat' You've probably seen our posters."

"What did the astronaut get instead of athlete's foot? Missile Toe"

"I dumped my girlfriend, Ruth, the other day. I told myself I'm just gonna be Ruthless in love from now on."

"What do you call an overpriced castration? A divorce."

"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's a really obscure number and you've probably never heard of it."