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Joke of the Day

"What has handles and flies? A witch in a garbage can."

"Who is the bees favourite pop group ? The bee gees !"

"A deer walks out of a gay bar... ""Wow. I can't believe I just blew sixty bucks!"""

"Why was WWI so short? Because they were Russian... Why was WWII so long? They were Stalin..."

"I'm so old I thought ""stfu"" was a reminder to pack my ""shoes, tie, fedora, underpants."""

"As a fat guy I never really have more pep in my step... But I do occasionally get a little more throttle in my waddle."

"Mum: Why does your little brother jump up and down before taking his medicine? Boy: Because he read the label and it said 'shake well before using.'"

"With the ides of March around the corner Remember to stab your salad 23 times"

"George Ezra must really love his calculator if he wrote a song about it. *Cassy O'*"

"My wife asked me if I wanted to be cremated after my death Or immediately before."