37433
Joke of the Day
"What idiot called them dog tags instead of collar ID"
Next Joke
"If you're a Mormon, and you have a mom, and you haven't been referring to her exclusively as Mitt Momney...then why the hell are you Mormon?"
"it's weird how Americans say ""soccer"" instead of ""football"" and my dad says ""I wish you were dead"" rather than ""i love you"""
"Why did OP's mom leave the prostitution business? It got too gonor-real"
"That's one healthy flower bed you've got blooming in your backyard. How many bodies do you have buried there? -My attempts at small talk."
"I'll have you know, I've been sober for just over 100 days. Not like, in a row or anything...just in general."
"Bono played a prank on me yesterday and I wasn't happy. He really pushed me over The Edge."
"How do you kill a hipster? Drown him in the mainstream."
"My phone dies, freeing me from my prison. I look up at the world. Deer live in my house."
"I nominate Chris Brown to dump a bucket of boiling hot water on himself & to raise awareness for domestic violence."