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Joke of the Day

"The Twelve Days of Christmas would cost$107,000 this year which is relatively cheap considering the amount of human trafficking in the song."

"Why do women have legs? Have you seen the mess snails make?"

"What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Christopher Walken"

"As a grown woman with no children or morals to slow me down, I will have a definite advantage during tomorrow's family Easter egg hunts."

"Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar.. ...and doesn't"

"Jehovah's Witness: Do you have time to talk about Jesus? Jesus: *In disguise* sure JW: He's lame J: *rips off fake beard* Big mistake pal"

"what do eggs benedict and a blow job have in common? you dont get either at home."

"What did the Romans say to each other after crucifying Jesus? ""Nailed it!"""

"TIL back in the day there were only 25 letters in the alphabet. Nobody knew y."

"I'm going to open a restaraunt called pantera bread It will be similar to panera bread, but the food we serve will be much heavier"