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Joke of the Day

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Hippie Barbie ...complete with simulated controlled substances and paraphernalia"

"How to be depressed Step 1. Go to 1973 and sell 10% shares of apple for $800 Step 2. Realise those 10% is worth $43 billion nowadays."

"You know that one cow in the field that's like 200 yards away from all his cow friends just doing his own thing? That's me. I am that cow."

"Why did the boy become an astronaut? Because he was told he was no earthly good."

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Don't be silly, feminists can't change anything!"

"Why did God give women yeast infections? So they would have to know what it's like to live with an annoying cunt too."

"All I'm saying is that if M&M's poured out of a person after you stabbed them, I'd probably lose my moral compass very quickly."

"What do 9/10 people enjoy? Gangrape"

"No one is listening until you make a mistake."

"A little black baby dies and goes to heaven... God gives him wings. The little black baby says, ""wow God, does this mean I'm an angel?"" God replies, ""Nah nigga, you a bat""."