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Joke of the Day

"Girl at store thought CNN's Situation Room starred The Situation. No. Wolf Blitzer joins the cast of #jerseyshore next season."

"What is the difference between a pitbull and a Golden Retriever? A Golden Retriever can sing better."

"The best part of waking up is when you say ""fuck it"" and go back to sleep."

"What's the Turkish version of court packing? Turkey stuffing"

"What's the difference between Britain and Australia? When one votes, it changes something, making things worse. When another votes, it doesn't change anything, making things worse."

"Waiter waiter does the pianist play requests? Yes sir. Then ask him to play tiddlywinks until I've finished my meal."

"I covered myself from head to toe in mirrors today. I don't really know why, maybe I'm just at that age where you do a lot of reflecting..."

"Some jokes are like doctors... They get better with repeated deliveries."

"What do you call a large predatory bird with poor social skills? Hawkward"

"I'd be scared to buy an LG Tv Liam Neeson may find me!"