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Joke of the Day

"ALADDIN: i can show you the world JASMINE: wat why. do u kno that there are people out there. why do u think we live ina palace. no thank u"

"QUESTION: Why should a honeymoon only be six days? ANSWER: Because seven days makes a whole week."

"Let's hope no one builds a convenience store inside a volcano because that doesn't seem like it would be convenient at all."

"Hey, the army. Camouflage your helicopters blue, not green. You're fucking welcome."

"I RT you, you ignore me I fav you, you ignore me I ignore you, you ignore me This seems to be working out well for us"

"I'm a die hard Bruce Willis fan."

"All this negativity in the world and I still remain Positive! -Magic Johnson"

"Yo mama is so fat... That the sorting hat put her in the waffle house!"

"What's long, hard, and filled with semen? A submarine, what were you thinking of?"

"""Come reckon with me bro."" -Force"