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Joke of the Day

"Boss: You're late! On Friday, I made it clear that anyone arriving late would be fired Me: Well I didn't know! I ducked out early on Friday"

"A dyslexic robber walks into a bank... He says, ""air in the hands mother-stickers, this is a fuck-up!"""

"How many Dragonball Z characters does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, but it takes three episodes."

"What does the Mafia and pussies have in common? One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit"

"what do Chinese people say when it is sunny outside. what do Chinese people say when it is sunny outside i wish it was raining cats and dogs that would be dericious"

"Did you hear about the cabriolet driver who caused a fatal accident? He was driving roof-less."

"If your ex wife, and ex mother in law were drowning and you could only save one.. What kind of sandwich would you make?"

"I knocked over the altar at a Buddhist temple the other day and spilled ash all over the monks They were incensed"

"My wife and I said we would only smoke after sex.... I have had the same pack of cigarettes since 2007, im starting to get worried about my wife though shes been going through 3 packs a day!"

"How's everyone holding up? It's crazy out there! I've killed 15 zombies so far! And why the hell are they all carrying candy?"