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Joke of the Day

"Movie pitch: There's this guy named Craig that makes a list of Jews he can save from Naz... what?"

"What Does A Ghost Cow Say? Moo!"

"What's the difference between a hotdog and a dead baby? You don't ejaculate on a hotdog before you eat it."

"I'm really surprised I decided to get Botox. At least I think I'm surprised, I can't really tell."

"Did y'all hear the one about the professional jump-roper? Never mind. *Skip it*."

"When you think your life couldn't be any more pathetic, remember some people have more than 1 Facebook account."

"Dear whoever is playing sweet child o' mine at 2:30 in the night at full blaring volume to disturb the whole neighborhood......NICE!"

"Why is a dachshund a cowboy's favorite dog? They're always singing about getting a ""long little doggy""."

"How do you cut the Roman Empire in half? With a pair of Caesars!"

"Just saw a car with a license plate that says FLSH ME. Ok, douche. What are you, a dead goldfish? Flush yourself."