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Joke of the Day
"How do you get your girlfriend to stop smoking?? Slow down and grab some lube!!"
Next Joke
"How does Hitler tie his shoes? In little Nazis."
"Him: Didn't you buy that apple pie yesterday? Me: Yeah, so? Him: There's one small piece left. Me: And if you touch it, I'll stab you."
"Autocorrect and I are so close, we finish each other's sentinels."
"I'm sorry, I don't have the energy to walk a mile in your shoes. I'm just going to go ahead & judge you."
"Brooklyn When you go to Brooklyn always bring a camera, because there are many things in Brooklyn that you will see, then never see again in your life... Starting with that camera."
"What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down and use Lubricant."
"What is the most whoreish profession today? Store greeters. They let everybody 'come inside'! no offense folks! :)"
"What do you call a girl with braces? A Black & Decker Pecker Wrecker^™"
"Whoever says Paper beats Rock is an idiot. Next time I see someone say that I will throw a rock at them while they hold up a sheet of paper"