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Joke of the Day

"So Helen Keller walks into a bar Then she walks into a table. Then she walks into a lamp. Then she walks into the wa- ok, you get the idea."

"I heard someone proposed a Tupac movie. But it was shot down."

"There are so many gay bars in San Francisco; It's hard to keep them all straight."

"What do you call a Black Man flying a Plane? The Pilot you racist fuck."

"Condoms aren't as safe as they make them out to be... My friend was wearing one when he got hit by a truck. He's not doing too well..."

"Maths joke: if you have a pizza with radius z and thickness a, it's volume is pizza (or pi*z*z*a)"

"How can you tell an auto mechanic just had sex? One of his fingers is clean"

"[getting an x-ray] TECHNICIAN: Quit putting that box of chocolates on your chest. ME: Just tell me which ones are coconut."

"ME: woud u be open to adoption? HUSBAND: yes [later, at the adoption agency] ME: yes hi, i'd like to put my husband up for adoption"

"Snoop Dogg announced he's quitting rapping to open an ice cream shop. He's now known as Scoop Dogg."