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Joke of the Day

"My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died... She was attacked by a giant crab."

"I like my women like I like my coffee Ground up and put in a freezer"

"My sex life is like 9/11 No one wanted it."

"How many Scottish highlanders does it take to change a light bulb? There can be only one."

"Life hack: Go into a promising career field with good benefits and a 401(k) because you're not talented enough to be famous"

"And the Lord said unto John, '.... come forth and ye shall receive eternal life.' But John came fifth and won a toaster."

"Whats Wolverine's favorite genre of music? Metal."

"What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell, she's holding a grenade !"

"The worst thing about dating is bringing a nice guy home after dinner, only to find your husband home early from work."

"What's a mixed feeling? When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car. "