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Joke of the Day

"i was walking down the street, when someone threw a packet of cod liver oil at my head........ .......but i only suffered super fish oil injuries"

"Grammar is important. It's the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit."

"What do catholic priests and McDonalds workers have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns."

"What would you do? if your uncle jack helped you down off an elephant, would you help your uncle jack off an elephant?"

"Whats the problem with running through a field of dead babies? Your erection...."

"The Past, Present, and Future walk into a bar... ...it was tense."

"Maybe if we start smacking people when they say something stupid, evolution will eventually create a delay between thinking and speaking."

"All men are the same Said the Chinese woman who lost her husband in a crowd"

"Hey! Need an ark! I noah a guy."

"bloke in the pub The other night, this bloke in the pub was telling me he was a big star in the 80's with a song called ""stand and deliver"". I didn't believe a word he said, but he was adamant"