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Joke of the Day

"They say that all things come in threes and yeah maybe I did too once because I was really drunk and she looked like a five."

"Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get the Chinese Newspaper. Do you get it? . . . . . . . Me neither, I get the New York Times"

"You know pterodactyls' don't make noise right? Even the P is silent."

"What's the difference between a joke and 3 cocks? You can't take a joke."

"And if you can't be with the one you love, eat because you're bored."

"Why was the man with size four shoes turned away from Mount Everest? Because climbing Mount Everest is no small feat"

"If you take the D out of Devil what do you get? the D"

"Why do Klingons feel very little pain? They produce a lot of endworfins."

"I live in constant fear that my kid will become a famous artist or painter and I will have thrown out about a trillion dollars of her work"

"Why are there commentators for televised sports? We can figure out what's going on live, but can't while watching it on tv?"