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Joke of the Day
"What is musical and handy in the supermarket. A Chopin Lizst."
Next Joke
"My parents would hide fruit roll ups on top of the refrigerator where I couldn't reach them. And leave chemicals under the sink."
"My brother & I've competed for title of family black sheep for yrs. He checked in at a strip-club...on FB. Well played brother, well played"
"What's Adolf Hitler's favorite letter? Not z, that's for sure."
"What's the difference between pink and purple? Grip strength."
"I hate when my congressman emails me to ""take action"" on an issue. Dude, you're the one in congress, you do something."
"Have you heard about the one about suicidal procrastinator He lived a long healthy life."
"OBAMA: I want to close Gitmo GOP: no OBAMA: But you haven't even GOP: no OBAMA: ... GOP: no OBAMA: I'm resigning GOP: no OBAMA: haha gotcha"
"My grandma got breast cancer and is getting a mastectomy. That's certainly a weight off her chest."
"[OC] Did you hear about the two fruits who weren't allowed to get married? Turns out they cantaloupe."