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Joke of the Day

"Q: How can you tell which tricycle belongs to the blonde? A: It is the one with the kickstand."

"There is a Hispanic train conductor going around committing horrible crimes.. No one knows why, but it's clear he has a loco motive."

"Why did the bee put on a yarmulka He didn't want anyone to think he was a WASP."

"Doc: I'm afraid you got 6 months to live Me: Why are YOU afraid? Doc: I'm not Me: You said you were Doc: I lied. You got a month. HAPPY NOW?"

"Me: You should really try this lip gloss Her: this is super glue Me: HEAR ME OUT"

"A Christian telling an atheist that God will punish him ... [x-post from r/atheism] ... is like a hippy telling me that he's going to punch me in the aura."

"Can't live without your coffee? Tweet about it!"

"Why did the police arrest the energizer bunny? He was wanted for several charges of battery"

"[text from friend) Her: You doing okay? Me: Yeah I guess. Why, what have you heard?"

"What's the best thing about North Korea? The traffic."