127174

Joke of the Day

"Why did the police arrest the energizer bunny? He was wanted for several charges of battery"

"What's it called when a huge hole opens up in the ground in the middle of Spring? Sinkhole de Mayo"

"What type of truck takes a very long time to reach its destination? A log n truck."

"What's the difference between little girls and wine? Wine gets better as it gets older"

"My kid asked for help with her report but if I did it for her she won't learn! So I showed how to google, change name, & print on her own."

"Cute cat ""Thanks. We dont let him in though cause he shreds"" You mean sheds? ""No"" [gestures to cat shredding to Van Halen on the back patio]"

"How do you call the current situation in Syria? Very syrias"

"When I die, I hope I have enough time to point at a complete stranger and whisper ""You did this."""

"Arguing on the internet is like competing in the Special Olympics Even if you win, you're still fucking retarded."

"Breakfast I went to a restaurant that serves breakfast at any time. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance."