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Joke of the Day

"I booked a suite at a 5 star hotel and when my girlfriend arrived,on the bed spelled out in rose petals was ""be right out,I'm taking a shit"""

"Have you heard about Unilevers ice cream It was their magnum opis. (Yes, I know next to no one will get this joke at all)"

"I wonder if Jesus would have been as popular if his name was Eric."

"What do you call a Robert on a stick? A keBob!"

"What's Obama's favorite vegetable? Barackoli"

"twitter might remove the 140 character limit so i'm putting some 800 word tweets with character development & plot twists in my drafts"

"Why were Democrats in the lead early on? Republicans weren't off of work yet."

"The best way to see if someone is telling the truth is to tie them to a chair and start up the ol chainsaw."

"What do fish talk about at work? Current events"

"What's the etiquette on petting a baby that's been leashed to the bike rail outside Starbucks?"