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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an Arab oil baron with Parkinson's? Sheik Shake"

"Where does Google and Apple get their weather information? The Cloud."

"Why did God kick Joe Paterno out of Heaven? ....because he picked Michael Jackson as his new assistant coach."

"Tried to make a video seductively licking the frosting from an Oreo, but got excited and ate the whole thing. Twenty times."

"Maybe Jesus went black, and that's why he isn't coming back."

"What do you call an abominable snowman who's always late? A not-yeti."

"I really lack the words to compliment myself today."

"The best thing about being single is sleeping around. You can sleep all over that lonely bed of yours. Left, right, middle, whatever."

"Whenever your ex says, ""You'll never find someone like me,"" the answer to that is, ""That's the point."""

"I read in my girlfriend's diary...... that I have real trust issues!! What a bunch of BS..."