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Joke of the Day

"There are Three Rings to Marriage The Engagement Ring The Wedding Ring And The Suffering"

"FRIEND:i suffer badly with insomnia ME:what's that FRIEND:it's where you can't sleep ME:you just*lays down*just like this *falls asleep*see?"

"I wish genders were more like the twin towers At least the people who changed the number of towers realised we all hated them and they died"

"I'm told that if you eat pineapple or carrots in excess, your come will taste like that food... Is this why my Japanese girlfriend's pussy tastes like raw fish?"

"My friend gave me a free dvd... but it's only Chinatown."

"What do you call a vagina born on May 14th?... ... a CliTaurus"

"A really hate it when people ask me what I'll be doing in 5 years time. I mean, come on guys, I don't have 20/20 vision."

"Helicopter crash A helicopter crashed today over a cemetery on the outskirts of the city. So far the authorities have recovered over 200 bodies."

"What does eatin' pussy and the mafia have in common? One slip of the tongue and your in deep shit!"

"""Why does the Mexican Olympic Team suck?"" ""Because anyone who can run, jump or swim is already here, raping and killing Americans"" -Donald Trump"