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Joke of the Day
"me: hello darkness my old friend darkness: you are going to hate me but I forgot your name"
Next Joke
"Wife Missing My wife has been missing for a week. The police called me and said to prepare for the worst. So I went back to Goodwill and bought all her clothes back."
"If you tell me to make myself at home, don't be surprised when I take my pants off and drink all your vodka."
"A friend showed me a funny steak pun the other day. I must say, steak puns are truly a rare medium well done."
"A bad joke hit a good joke... ...what a bad joke."
"Guys, throw away ALL your favorite things. Go to Pier 1, buy some throw pillows and potpourri. Ok, you're ready for marriage."
"I convinced my son he has asthma so I wouldn't have to waste a bunch of money on team sports."
"*knock knock* ""Are you a Jehovah's Witness""?"
"What lurks in the dark, has wings and sucks blood? The new Always Ultra."
"My girlfriend is like Christmas.. Only comes once a year."