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Joke of the Day

"""Kids are picking on me, Mom"" I'll teach you how to fight, son. ""Yes!"" [Mom spreads rumors about son and ignores him for 3 days]"

"On average, how many people are dead in a cemetery? All of them."

"I forgot my brother's birthday last month. What did he say? Rick: Nothing yet."

"I think everyone should stop ogling Kobe. He's not a piece of meat."

"Where do german parents send their ADD kids? Concentration Camps"

"Do you like tapes and CDs? (Only open if yes) (or not I don't Carr) Yea? Tape this dick to your forehead so you can CDs nuts"

"Two mens are under a tent Two men are under a tent when one of them ask the second one: -Are you masturbating? -Yes why? -Then can you use your penis instead of mine?"

"Sometimes I think I've missed my calling. Luckly for me I have voicemail."

"What has 2 legs and bleeds profusely? Half a cat"

"A skelleton goes to the bar and says ""Can I have a pint and a mop..."""