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Joke of the Day

"I wanted to get into the right mood for my essay about american patriotism.. so i shouted at my essay ""You Essay"", ""You Essay"", ""YOU ESSAY"""

"What is springy and springy? the Easter Bunny"

"Difference between Men and Women Women may be able to fake orgasms but men can fake relationships!"

"So a blind man walks by a fish market... And when he walks by the market he takes a deep breathe and says... hello ladies!"

"What's the difference between parsley and pussy? Who eats parsley?"

"What language do fast talkers from Moscow speak? *Rush*ian!"

"I met a geologist the other day He seemed gneiss."

"I may not know much about a lot of things, but this fact I'm sure of: A smoke detector battery will never go dead during the day."

"I don't want Harriet Tubman on my $20's I don't want them to be worth 3/5 of their value"

"Wearing crocs is like getting a blowjob from a guy... Feels good until you look down and realize you're gay."