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Joke of the Day

"What's black white red all over and can't go through a revolving door A nun with a spear through her"

"My 5'2"" friend and a person in debt both have something in common. They're both coming up short."

"I love when you're choking someone and they are all ""I can't breathe"", duh I'm choking you."

"How many doors are on a chicken coop? Two. If it had four, it would be a sedan."

"Who did the Rebel pilot pledge loyalty to before crashing into the Death Star? ADMIRAL ACKBAR!!!"

"[At maternity ward] Me: is this where babies are delivered Nurse: Yes Me: You ought to be ashamed. Babies need their livers"

"What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day? A forty-carrot wedding ring."

"What's blue and hangs from a tree in my yard? Its my nigger, I can paint him whatever color I want."

"So I was sitting outside today when all these guys flew over and just started sticking it in... I must have swatted 20 mosquitos..."

"People say filling animals with helium is wrong but i say, whatever floats your goat."