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Joke of the Day

"What is green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table"

"Why is Peter Pan always flying? He neverlands. I like this joke because it never grows old. -I saw this on twitter today and laughed, so I thought I would share."

"What's worse than locking your keys in your car at the abortion clinic? When you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger."

"An Ob-Gyn asks a woman to get in the stirrups and he says, ""My god, you have the biggest vagina I've ever seen!"" She says, ""Well you didn't have to say it twice."" He says, ""I didn't""."

"How much does Jesus love you? Thiiiiiiis much. (Must be said while arms are raised out to side)"

"I bought my epileptic boyfriend a strobe light for his birthday. He's gonna have a fit when he sees it."

"Brunos are from Mars, Freddies are from Mercury."

"A good pun is hard to find, like a good steak... *The medium's rarely well-done.*"

"She asked for my name, if I'm alone, had me remove belt/shoes & take out what I have in my pants. Interactions w/TSA agents are underrated."

"Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water? . Because if they fell forwards they'd still be in the boat"