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Joke of the Day
"Alcohol is like real life photoshop for ugly people."
Next Joke
"Just watched some Midget Wrestling. It was a short fight."
"Star Wars Spoilers (not really) Dumbledore dies!"
"My wife recommended I do some light reading to relax at the end of the day... Not really relaxing, as my eyes are in pain, but I managed to make out, ""60 Watts - Made in China."""
"Why did the Marxist drop out of school? He didn't like the classes."
"It's ridiculous that the pope has to go around surrounded by armed guards these days I know he's a priest but he's not going to do anything out in public"
"If you can tell from my eye contact at the grocery store that I'm inviting you to race shopping carts, you're my kinda people."
"A study was just conducted to see what the #1 fear in humans is The results came back, and it's cats. But something seems a little off. They've only done testing on mice so far"
"What's the difference between a baby and a submarine? I've never been in a submarine."
"What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virginia mobile"