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Joke of the Day
"Her: *""Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?""* Me: *""Yes""*"
Next Joke
"90% of owning a dog is telling it to stop barking."
"Why did Trump run in Us instead of Canada? Because He's worried that he would win with a minority government."
"My Italian grandmother just got a stair chair lift, I asked her how she likes it... she said ... ""IT DRIVES ME UP THE FUCKING WALL"""
"I bet rocket scientists are conceited bastards. ""YOU CALL THIS A MARTINI? THIS ISN'T ROCKET SCIENCE DAMMIT! I WOULD KNOW!"""
"Did you hear the story about the razorback hog? It's pretty dull."
"Sad how some stick figures get stuck working the hangman game, while others get to have nice families on the back of SUVs"
"If accounts on every social media site have taught me anything it's that I'm so glad my family doesn't know my username."
"If you don't need to change shirts after eating a hot dog you're not doing it right."
"Doctor Doctor I dream there are monsters under my bed what can I do? Saw the legs off of your bed!"